character development – Page 3

parasha Kedoshim 5784

“And G-d created man in His own image, in the image of God created He him; male and female created He them” (Genesis 1:27, JPS). We are created b’tzelem Elokim – in the image of G-d – as is written. We are to imitate G-d, in a sincere effort to live up to that image. In specific, we should focus our efforts on an attempt to approach His level of holiness, even if this may not seem like it is within our own power to do so.

“Speak unto all the congregation of the children of Israel, and say unto them: Ye shall be holy; for I the L-RD your G-d am holy” (Leviticus 19:2, JPS). The question may be asked, relevant to the theme of obtaining kedushah (holiness) in our lives, how are we even able to approach the level of G-d’s holiness? We may understand this level of holiness as an ideal standard, that we are to set as our goal. Yet, its attainment is by no means easy, nor even possible without HaShem at the helm of our ship, guiding our way upon the ocean of life.

The opening verse, “You shall be holy, because HaShem your Gd is holy,” serves as a guiding principle, that continues to be expounded upon throughout the rest of the parasha. The principle of holiness is applied even to what might otherwise be considered as the mundane affairs of mankind. For example, consider the following commandment:

“Ye shall do no unrighteousness in judgment, in meteyard, in weight, or in measure” (Leviticus 19:35, JPS 1917 Tanach). The Torah calls for “equal weights and measures.” As is mentioned elsewhere, “Divers weights, and divers measures, both of them alike are abomination to the L-RD” (Proverbs 20:10, JPS 1917 Tanach). Although, we are not all merchants, called to right business practices, this commandment may be considered in regard to the positive character trait of honesty. Many others follow.

Shabbat shalom.
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Omer Count: Day 17 – tiferes shebbe tiferes

Tiferes shebbe Tiferes: Harmony within Harmony

The epitome of harmony and balance within all of creation was present in the beginning within Gan Eden (the Garden of Eden). That harmony was disrupted, when Adam and Chava (Eve) partook of forbidden fruit from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. Up until that moment, the progenitors of humankind lived in a nondual world of blissful connection to G-d. Their relationship to Him was whole, and immersed in complete Oneness. They were at one with each other, and all of creation as well.

However, subsequent to their disobedience, the world became an admixture of good and evil. Throughout history, these two forces often appeared in sharp outlines, discernible even to the casual eye, as well as the more carefully honed conscience. Today, the blur between good and evil that seems to have proliferated during the last several decades is increasing to the point whereof the boundaries are no longer clearly marked in society. Moreover, the emergent zeitgeist reflects the prophet’s words, “woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that change darkness into light, and light into darkness; that change bitter into sweet, and sweet into bitter” (Isaiah 5:20, JPS 1917 Tanach).

Through emes (truth) and emunah (faith), harmony can be restored. By bringing compassion into a disharmonious world, beginning within our own spheres of existence, we can meet the challenges ahead. Mankind has fallen far since the days of yore; yet, recovery of the soul is still possible.

day 6 – counting of the omer

Day 6 – yesod (foundation) shebbe chesed (love) – the nature of giving

The foundation of love rests upon our ability to give to others. The quality of our love towards others is empowered by how we give. The reciprocity of love is strengthened by the give and take in a relationship. An ever-flowing pattern develops, akin, by way of analogy, to the way water circulates on the earth.

“All the rivers run into the sea; yet the sea is not full; unto the place from whence the rivers come, thither they return again” (Ecclesiastes 1:7). When water evaporates, the droplets ascend to rakia (sky), from where they are condensed within rainclouds; then, the water droplets fall back to the earth in a continuous cycle. This natural exchange is symbolic of the reciprocity of an ideal relationship.

A healthy relationship requires both individuals to have a reciprocal attitude of giving.

Day 4 – counting of the omer

netzach shebbe chesed

The emotional attribute of netzach (endurance) also means perseverance, resilience, and forbearance. In life, our feelings do not remain static. Challenges will impact our ability to remain calm, patient, and loving. Endurance of the adversities that are encountered day by day, will help to transcend the negative and keep a smile on our face.

Relationship commitments with others also require endurance. Personal bonds with others need to be sustained through forbearance of the other’s faults. A strong emotional tie is not enough unless the commitment to be loving also incorporates the tenacity to endure the challenges between two people in relationship to each other.

Love requires the grit of commitment to endure. Persistent kindness covers all faults.

Day 3 – counting of the omer

Tiferes shebbe Chesed

The nature of tiferes, in terms of its expression as a middah (character trait), can best be designated as “harmony.” Therefore, one question for today could be construed as whether or not one’s acts of loving-kindness are performed in a way that denotes a harmonious balance to all concerned in the endeavor.

Moreover, in our own personality makeup, where is the harmony within that can promote feelings of kindness to others? Sincere kindness flows from a peaceful, harmonious place within ourselves. Are you able to envision your heartfelt acts of kindness bringing harmony to the lives of others? Or do you think of your kindnesses only as a small drop in the bucket?

Consider that the ripple effect of kindness may be greater than you can imagine.

Day 2 – counting of the omer

gevurah shebbe chesed

The middah (character trait) of gevurah may be expressed as a measure of strictness. Therefore, one way of conceiving of gevurah within chesed could have to do with applying a measure of strictness to the quality of kindness. Placing a limit on our kindness, in response to the awareness that not every situation is best suited to respond in kindness involves a dash of wisdom.

Therefore, chesed may require the use of discernment, in order to ascertain how much kindness would be appropriate to the situation. Boundaries are essential to the maintenance of identity. Where do I begin and the other person starts? This question must be regulated in real time by each and every individual. Being kind to others, without standing up for oneself simply amounts to people pleasing, at the expense of oneself.

There must be a healthy balance between chesed and gevurah, and sometimes the strictness of gevurah is necessary to restore a sense of self and integrity.

Day 1 – counting of the omer

Day 1 – chesed within chesed

The amount of kindness that we show to others is dependent on how we view and treat ourselves. Genuine kindness is from a place of empathic consideration for the other. If we are kind to ourselves, we may be kind to others. We should act toward others the way we would show kindness to ourselves. This is encapsulated in the commandment to love your fellow as yourself.

The mercy that we show to others, especially in times of weakness, when we might otherwise respond in a harsh manner, is a way of transcending the egotistical drives that fashion us as human beings. Our instincts are usually focused more on ourselves than others. Yet, being truly human, means going beyond our comfort zone, by not giving in to our lesser inclinations and selfishness.

We must seek the welfare of others, not only ourselves. In this way, we lift up our souls to be cleansed from taint and impurity.

Seeking Solace Amidst the Chaos

There is a spirit of unrest upon the world. I am speaking figuratively; yet, I am reminded of the opening of the Book of Genesis. The Ruach HaElokim (the spirit of G-d) hovered over the water. The earth itself was tovu vavohu – formless and void – and there was “darkness upon the face of the deep; and the spirit of G-d hovered over the face of the waters” (Genesis 1:2, JPS). The opening passage of the six days of Creation has to do with the unfolding of chaos into order over successive stages in the earth’s history.

It seems that rather than progressing from chaos into order according to G-d’s directive, his creation has again descended into chaos. This restlessness that compels dissent, protest, and division is in direct contrast to G-d’s presence hovering over the waters at the beginning of creation. Yet, there must be a compelling reason to believe that G-d’s presence, although not discernible at times, is still with His creation. And, He is the only One of whom we may turn toward to still the restlessness in our hearts.

For, if we tune into His presence within the silence of the nighttime, or in the early hours of the morning, the daily grind, and excessive focus on world events melts away into the air. It is at this quiet time, from evening to dawn, that solitude may be sought in the stillness. Within that peace, that is almost tangible, begins renewal, and the realization off what is essential in life.

A certain kind of detachment from the uproars in society, as portrayed in the news, and people’s constant attention on these distractions, is necessary in order to remove ourselves from the turmoil, so that our emotions are not compelled to react in a negative way. Without the solace provided by seeking out the peace from Above, I can’t imagine how else to bear with the incessant continuation of noise, whether it’s political, cultural, or societal. Religion has always provided a sanctuary for the heart and troubled mind, and faith the constant security of the soul.

Day Two: The Waters of Division

On the second day, G-d spoke the firmament into existence. He separated between the waters beneath and above the firmament. This separation brought into actuality, the atmosphere of the earth, and the point where space begins. Although, Ramban contends that the separation was between the spiritual domain and the material existence of the Universe. This rendering would denote the difference between Heaven, in the sense of a spiritual realm, and earth, akin to malchus – where G-d’s Presence can be found by way of His quality of immanence.

Unfortunately, many today in the world, have no concept of the heavenly as a spiritual dimension, except to a vague degree, nor, are some able to see beyond the material, acknowledging the spiritual. This unfortunate state of affairs has given rise to greater materialism, as well as doctrines that promote the advance of materialism. Hence, we here an emphasis on equity, to the exclusion of divinity, human rights, instead of human responsibilities to both G-d and man. Ask not what is due to you; rather, ask what you can contribute to the betterment of the world, in tandem with G-d’s design and divine plan.

Furthermore, in regard to the separation of the waters, Rashi comments that this division symbolized strife; and, for this reason, the second day was not referred to as “good.” Therefore, a parallel can be drawn to the disvalue of strife, as opposed to the inherent value of unity. As applied to a modern-day context, it can be understood that a separation between spiritual and material is problematic, in that both were meant to complement each other. The phrase, “heaven and earth” epitomizes this complemental relationship between the spiritual and material realms. To deny the spiritual realm in favor of the material leads to imbalance, and visa versa as well. The incorporation of the two leads to the fundamental aspects of our nature being acknowledged, so that harmony can prevail within and without.

Being Human is Key

When you begin to associate the identity of another person with his or her politics, then you are viewing them through the lens of identity-politics. Therefore, you have fallen prey to the divisive zeitgeist of our current times. Transcend this limited view by seeing the other as a whole person, not only as someone whose view is such and such.

Whether Republic or Democrat, Woke or Conservative, pro-Israel or pro-Palestinian, we are all human beings, regardless to what degree we have or have not embraced or represented our own humanity as individuals. This does not mean that we will all be able to reconcile our differences; yet, our shared commonalities should not be overlooked. To see the other, first and foremost as a person, rather than a representative of an identity-group is key to better understanding.

Only by fostering an element of respect toward others, even if not reciprocated, can we claim our humanity. The effort starts with those who have a conscious awareness of themselves and others as created in the image of G-d. Step forward and introduce yourself by name, not by the party or political viewpoints that you ascribe toward.

Most importantly, know that you are more than the viewpoints that you uphold. The personal is not the same as the political. In-depth acknowledgment of who you are as an individual human being should be primary within the framework of identity.