inspiration – Page 2 – The Tree of Life

Family Matters

It is an illusion to think that we can leave our loved ones in the hands and expert care of professionals, who claim to offer services for the elderly. Admittedly so, this is a generalization; I am compelled to write about this issue, because my mother is in a less than ideal situation at a facility wherein she is on the independent living side of the facility at 82 years old, and clearly in need of more assistance than she is receiving there. The answer is not for her to transition to the assisted living side of the building; rather, her loved ones, including myself, should be at her side, throughout the day, guiding and comforting her.

People do not want to recognize the slow decline of life, inclusive of diminished abilities to function as one did in their younger years. We do not want to acknowledge that we age, as is natural, and enter a period of time, where we should be more focused on spiritual things, looking ahead to eternity. We are only concerned about material comfort, including that of our loves ones, as if we are absolved of our familial duties. So, my Mom is an independent living facility, losing her independence.

This is and has always been tragic – the slow and gradual shift away from family-centered life, to lives dependent upon our vocations, interests, and going our separate ways, all a part of the process of individuation, and finding “our place” in the world. Perhaps, if we have other means, we should not entrust our loved ones into the hands of professional corporations, who may not be as human-oriented as they could be, because after all it is a corporation with a bottom line. Love cannot be substituted for money as a motivating factor to treat human beings with compassion. And, I am as guilty as my brother and sister. And, we are all trying to make amends… somehow.

Elul Preparation: Day 6

Elul Preparation: Day 6:

The importance of Elul with respect to Tammuz and Av. The culmination of the mourning process for the Beis HaMikdash leads into the month of introspection: this is no coincidence; rather, everything on the Hebrew calendar is divinely ordained. The Bnei Yissacher explains, that the month of Elul is associated with the pasuk (verse), “I will extol Thee, O L-RD, for Thou hast raised me up…” (Psalm 30:2).

Inasmuch that H’Shem’s Presence is amongst us, we may be lifted up out of the mire, so to speak, through teshuvah, during the month of Elul. As a result, we should exalt Him above our everyday concerns, placing our focus on Himas our highest priority in life. This doesn’t mean that we have to spend hours upon hours each day in the synagogue and studying Torah; rather, in all that we do (see Proverbs 3), we must have our eyes gazing toward Heaven with H’Shem in mind.

The Bnei Yissacher notes that the second part of the verse, “and my enemies did not rejoice over me,” refers to the teaching from the Zohar that the months of Nissan, Iya, and Sivan were given as a portion by lot to Jacob, while the months of Tammuz, Av, and Elul were given to Esau. Esau took a dark pleasure, a type of schadenfreude, in Israel being deprived of the sanctity of these months as preparation. Yet, Jacob wrested these out of the hands of Esau, re-establishing them for the sake of preparing the soul before Rosh HaSHannah; so, Esau was not able to rejoice.

What deeper insights can be drawn from this teaching? Ultimately, the yetzer hara, perhaps, here represented by Esau, cannot succeed in taking the opportunity away from us to repent during the month of Elul, try as much as it may. Even so, our efforts must be in the form of a sincere endeavor toward teshuvah, or else, G-d forbid, our yetzer hara may hamper our efforts.

Elul Preparation: Day 4

Tikkun HaNefesh (Renewal of the Soul) Day 4

The first set of tablets were broken. The second set of tablets were received after Moshe was on Sinai from the beginning of the month of Elul until the 10^th of Tishrei. These second tablets represent teshuvah, in the sense that our lives may be broken to a greater or lesser degree by our sinful nature (yetzer hara). If we do not make an attempt to mend the soul, then our connection to H’Shem will continue to suffer. As is written, “your sins have separated between you and G-d” (Isaiah 59:2).

When Moshe ascended to Mount Sinai for forty days, in order to receive the second set of commandments, he entered into yisuv hadaat, a settled state of mind, where He could be receptive to H’Shem’s communication with him. This interior calmness, knowing that we can retreat there in all circumstances, once, we have fostered an awareness of that place of solitude within, and hined our ability to retreat there, in order to reside in our inner sanctum, is all the more necessary. Than in times past, today, when so much adversity, and so many challenges are faced by us, as the Geulah (Redemption) draws near.

The Bnei Issacher explains, that these days of divine favor, are additionally designated as such, because of the creation the world, that began on Elul 25^th, although it’s inception in the will of the Creator, occurred sometime earlier in the month of Elul. (Contrary to the basic assumption that the world was created, beginning on Tishrei 1, the first day of creation was on Elul 25^th. Mankind was created on the sixth day of creation, corresponding to Tishrei 1).

We should anticipate a renewal of the soul, as we draw closer to the days on the Hebrew calendar, when everything was originally tohu vavohu (formless and void). So, to, may our souls return to a state of pristine renewal, as if we are beginning again in our devotion to H’Shem. Even if we have not yet done a complete teshuvah by the end of the month, may it be merited to us anyway.* Amen.

*based on Bnei Yissacher: Elul 4

Tikkun HaNefesh: Day 3

Ever since the times of Adam, after the expulsion of Adam and Chava (Eve) from the Garden of Eden, there has been an admixture of good and evil in the world. These are not primarily something external, as outside of us, rather, the potential for either, to a lesser or greater degree lies within the soul of every human being. So, to find our way in this world, we need to recognize the difference between the two, searching within ourselves for the taint of the soul that prevents us from drawing closer to G-d.

The Bnei Yissacher explains that the month of Elul is a time of opportunity for teshuvah, a return to G-d that begins with reflection upon the condition of the soul. “His hand is outstretched” (Isaiah 9:11), so that we may return to Him in complete repentance. This requires a sincere confession, and not returning to the same types of sins that may have been plaguing our lives, up until the moment of Divine favor in Elul, when opportunity prevails to change.

I will add that there seem to be general sins, that constitute a way of life that is in discord, so that it is more of an underlying attitude, that may permeate the soul (G-d forbid) and clouds our reasoning. Then, there are specific sins that can be clearly identified: these would include bad habits, and anything we know as wrong, yet do anyway. Yet, we may have to search below the level of our initial awareness to uproot negative thoughts and attitudes. May these become clear through the light that G-d will bestow upon us for the sake of purifying our souls.

These thirty days of Elul are the beginning of a forty-day period of time, when Moshe ascended to Sinai, in order to receive the second set of commandments, after G-d’s granting of His forgiveness to Bnei Yisrael. In our own lives, we need to return again and again to G-d, by way of a more thorough teshuvah each time, so that our endeavor may be sufficient in His eyes.*

Tikkun HaNefesh: Day 2

Taming the Soul: Teshuvah & Binah

Upper teshuvah, in particular, according to the TANYA is associated with Binah; thus, it can be inferred that the cognitive powers of the attribute of Binah (Understanding) in the soul, may be used to foster teshuvah through discernment of the condition of one’s soul. May our souls reach the potential benefit designated, through a thorough reflection upon our faults, character defects, and aveiros, in order to gain more insight into our lives, for the sake of tikkun haNefesh (renewal of the soul).

To determine the state of the soul is a necessary task, especially beginning 30 days prior to Rosh HaShannah. If the soul is in disarray, its waywardness going unnoticed, now is the time to begin to make amends. Taming the soul is an endeavor that ranks in importance, higher than organizing our closets, cabinets, or files on a PC. If we take good care of our place of residence, how much more so should we invest in the purification of the soul? Namely, our souls are sanctified through observance of the mitzvoth (commandments). Yet, our character development may get neglected, like a car in need of a tune-up.

The solution is to be mindful enough throughout the day of our composure, adjusting our awareness to any neglected feelings or thoughts that are not in alignment with the ideal state of our soul. Thus, we can be reconciled to G-d, by taming our souls, day by day. We should also set aside a certain period of time, even if for only five minutes, to examine the conscience.

Gradually, we may recover our essential selves, by way of a continual teshuvah, rediscovering aspects within the framework of our character that need attention, for the sake of renewal. The month of Elul provides a thirty-day period to refine the soul in a manner befitting each of us.

Reparations of the Mind

“And it shall be righteousness unto us, if we observe to do all this commandment before the L-RD our G-d, as He hath commanded us.’” – Deuteronomy 6:29, JPS 1917 Tanach

“Your yes should be just, and your no should be just.” – Bava Metzia 49a

During the month of Elul, we should focus on preparing the heart for teshuvah. The Hebrew word, teshuvah connotes the understanding of returning to G-d, inasmuch that through a careful consideration of our ways, we should begin to make amends, for the sake of repairing the soul. As is written in the Talmud, “one should not say one matter with his mouth, and think one matter with his heart” (Bava Metzia 49a, sefaria.org). Moreover, we should not think that we are one way, namely a mensch (good person), when our speech and behavior do not represent the ideal self we would like to be.

In the Bnei Yissacher, a Chassidic text corresponding to the months of the year, the author notes, for the beginning of the month of Elul, that the Torah itself alludes to this month as a favorable time for teshuvah (repentance). He emphasizes, the importance of speaking with “a measure of righteousness,” so that speech is in accord with the truth. If we think one thing, yet say another, then we are being dishonest. Rather, we should make an effort to examine ourselves, in order to stand in our own integrity at all times.

This is not an easy task to adhere to, typically when around others, when we may be naturally inclined as human beings are, to reflect the thinking of others, rather than to assert our own convictions. Especially, in these times of social and moral confusion, standing in our integrity with an honesty of heart, and truthfulness of spirit is key.

Omer: Day 9 Gevurah: The Restraint of Might

gevurah shebbe gevurah- restraint of might

The strength of gevurah relies on the ability to restrain oneself. “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city” (Proverbs 16:32). Restraint of ourselves is key, not only for the benefit of our soul, also for the sake of being in a position to offer diplomatic relations to those who enter into conflict with us.

Another effective saying to keep in mind is that “he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife” (Proverbs 15:18). We would do well to learn from the wise words of King Solomon, for our hearts are heavy with the burdens we face; yet, too often, we are tempted to respond to others in a reactive way, rather in a manner of restraint.

If I may further explain, by way of a concrete example too rampant today. We, ourselves, might have fallen prey to the divisiveness that permeates society, dividing people into subgroups of us and them; the bitterness that festers as a result of demonizing the other, will only further the perpetuation of the lack of harmony in our lives, especially when our thoughts and rhetoric approaches the vitriolic.

Furthermore, the critical nature of the human heart, has the potential to fuel cancel culture, and further the categorization of classes of people in society into the oppressed and the oppressors, increasingly demonizing through generalizations. This is the result of permitting tyranny to rule the heart (G-d forbid).

Omer Count: Day 2 – the Boundary of Kindness

gevurah within chesed

The middah (character trait) of gevurah may be expressed as a measure of strictness. Therefore, one way of conceiving of gevurah within chesed could have to do with applying a measure of strictness to the quality of kindness. Placing a limit on our kindness, in response to the awareness that not every situation is best suited to respond in kindness involves a dash of wisdom. Therefore, chesed may require the use of discernment, in order to ascertain how much kindness would best benefit the recipient. Too much kindness might appear as ingratiating. Elsewise, being overly kind in order to please others could result in our resentment, when we give in to others demands. Placing a boundaried response on others requests, gives us a sense of acting from our center being, keeping our needs in mind, without overextending ourselves.

Consider how G-d’s chesed, His sense of kindness may be purposely limited at times for a specific reason, actually for the sake of the recipient. He is known to test the faith of those who have a certain level of trust in Him, by delaying a response to one’s tefillah (prayer) requests. This would be enacted on His part to test the strength of our faith. Also, He may not respond in the manner that one expects, because the specific request if answered in the way that the prayer was framed, would not best benefit that individual. In like manner, we should also be cautious, and excercise discernment in regard to how we respond to others who may seek our time, attention, or help.

Additionally, it might seem counterintuitive at the time; yet, a withholding attitude may be required at times, for the sake of another person’s personal growth. Refraining from helping someone too much may serve to encourage that person to do more for him or herself. So, often there needs to be a balance between chesed and gevurah in our responses to others; so, that the demands of the situation may be met in the most beneficial way to all concerned. An extreme version of applying a strong measure of gevurah to chesed would be the case in certain rare circumstances, to apply the notion of “tough love.” In this case, an act perceived as severe by the intended recipient might actually be more of an expression of sincere love, than giving in to another person, thereby enabling the other to perpetuate an undesirable behavior. In general, it is helpful to have a sense of prudence in regard to love.

Utlimately, finding the right balance in any situation is not easy. Often our response depends upon our own personality; for example, whether or not we are a chesed person, naturally demonstrating loving-kindness or whether we are more of a gevurah person, who is inclined to be more reserved and circumspect in responding to others. This example may best serve as a segue towards tikkun hanefesh (rectification of the soul), the precise purpose of the forty-nine day spiritual journey. To take an honest look at ourselves includes evaluating our character. If we withold kindness from others when we should be kind, this may denote an imbalance in the personality. Conversely, if we routinely find that being too nice to others has negative consequences for ourselves, then there may also be an imbalance of these qualities in our personality.

The task at hand is to reflect upon ourselves, in a manner that will bring the greatest level of shalom (peace) to our souls, as well as the lives of others on this journey. Moreover, in like manner that the Children of Israel had the opportunity to prepare themselves along the way to Sinai for receiving the Torah, so may we refine ourselves for the sake of our relationship to G-d. The first five commandments have to do with our connection to G-d, while the second set of five commandments are in regard to our relationship with others. Both are necessary on the journey of life; so, to shape our personalities in accordance with G-d’s will has the potential to bring the greatest overall benefit to our self and others.

note: These are my personal reflections on the implications of today’s combination of middot (character traits). These reflections are not meant to be comprehensive, inasmuch that they are not based upon any one particular system. Nor, may these ideas be characterized as authoritative, because I profess to being a student, not a teacher. I hope to inspire others to delve into an exploration of their personality, for the sake of tikkun hanefesh (rectification of the soul).

Omer Count: Day One – Introduction and Synopsis

Road to Spiritual Improvement

overview, weekly synopsis, day one

The Omer Count – counting of the Omer – may serve as a spiritual journey from Egypt to Sinai. We are called upon to leave our own personal mitzraim (Egypt; from metzeir, meaning “limitations”) behind us, as we travel on the path of freedom, away from the influence of the yetzer hara (evil inclination). This is a forty-nine day journey, aka self improvement plan, that begins on the eve of the second day of Passover. Each of the seven weeks corresponds to one of the seven middos (character traits) that we will have the opportunity to improve upon in our lives. And, each day of the week focuses on one aspect of that quality.

The first week is devoted to the middah of Chesed: primarily love, expressed as kindness, mercy, and compassion. The expansiveness of chesed is opposite the constrictive quality of gevurah. Chesed has to do with an openness of personality, as well as a friendly attitude towards others. From a psychological perspective, chesed would be akin to a high rating on the the Big Five personality traits to agreeableness. When we give from the heart to others, we are giving with chesed.

Day 1 – chesed within chesed

The amount of kindness that we show to others, despite other traits that might be less conducive to friendliness, is dependent on how we view and treat ourselves. Genuine kindness is from a place of empathic consideration for the other. The mercy that we show to others, in times of weakness, when we might otherwise respond in a harsh manner, is a way of transcending the egotistical drives that fashion us as human beings, instincts that are mostly focused on ourselves. Yet, being truly human means to go beyond our comfort zone, by not giving in to our lesser inclinations and selfishness.

note: These are my personal reflections on the implications of today’s combination of middot (character traits). These reflections are not meant to be comprehensive, inasmuch that they are not based upon any one particular system. Nor, may these ideas be characterized as authoritative, because I profess to being a student, not a teacher. I hope to inspire others to delve into their own exploration of personality characteristics, for the sake of tikkun hanefesh (rectification of the soul).

Rosh Chodesh Adar 5783

Rosh Chodesh Adar 5783: 30 Shevat – 1 Adar

Reflection on the new month: Rosh Chodesh Adar 5783

This Adar will bring the globe, including, Jewish communities around the world full circle, three times over; inasmuch, that it will have been about three years since the proliferation of the coronavirus. May H’Shem have mercy on us; may He bless our lives, family, friends, and communities. May He preserve us during the days that will follow.

For the pandemic, nor the ramifications manifest in technological innovations, as well as geopolitical concerns are still in motion. How will we respond to the inherent issues that will accompany vaccine passports, Digital I.D., and eventually a social credit scoring system for individuals, as well as businesses, corporations and universities. (ESG is already in place for these latter institutions).

For myself, I have found much opportunity for reflection, writing, and kavanah (intention) throughout these past three years. I would also recomend to others, to occupy oneself with heshbon hanefesh (literally, an accounting of the soul): To examine one’s conscience in this manner, has the potential to lead to joy down the road, after rooting out unhealthy maladaptive behaviors, negative character traits, and making an effort to do better.

Personally, I count the hours of each and every day, until evening, when I hope to have fulfilled the day’s tasks, that are expected of me from Above. Yet, there is a disconnect between my quiet, reflective way of life, somewhat isolated, and removed from the changes occurring around the globe. Even so, to remain unaware of these changes will only provide a false assumption that these changes will not impact me personally.

May we all be productive in divinely inspired ways, and ask ourselves whether the future that the world is heading toward is one that we would view as ultimately of benefit to humankind. For, utopias have been promised by many movements of past history; in these cases, the promises were never realized. Why would anyone think differently in this case, where currently it may be that we are headed toward a dystopia. Regardless, trust in G-d, His will, and purpose, that His plan will be fulfilled, irrespective of any pursuit that is counter to His divine blueprint for humanity.

The Hebrew month of Adar is traditionally associated with joy (Taanis 29a).

May our joys in life increase, despite the challenges ahead. Amein.