prayer – The Tree of Life

motzei Shabbos: Vayikra 5783

Korban – To Draw Close

“When any of you presents an offering…”

– Leviticus 1:2, NJPS

“As an olah is an offering that “rises” towards G’d in its entirety, since the whole of the animal is being offered on the altar, so is prayer an offering of the heart which rises toward Heaven in its entirety.” – Akeidas Yitzchak on Leviticus 1:2

The Hebrew word for offering is korban. The shoresh (root word) of korban is KRV, meaning “to draw near.” Therefore, the act of bringing an offering has the connotation of drawing near to H’Shem. According to Akeidas Yitzchak, the olah offering, in particular, represents prayer from the heart, because the olah completely ascends to H’Shem. Therefore, in like manner that the entire animal brought as an olah offering is consumed on the mizbeach (altar), so too, it can be said, that our prayers of the heart ascend entirely to G-d.

Interestingly enough, the name associated with the korbanot is YHVH, the name that denotes H’Shem’s Attribute of Mercy. Since the korban is not associated with the name, Elokim that represents the Attribute of Justice, the implication is that an offering permits us to draw near to H’Shem, because of His mercy towards us. Although the world was first created with the Attribute of Justice, denoted by the name Elokim (the name of G-d that first appears in the Creation narrative), later, the name YHVH appears, because the world could not survive without Mercy (see Rashi, Genesis 1:1). H’Shem’s Attribute of mercy makes an allowance for reconciliation through atonement, by way of a korban.

Today, even without the Beis HaMikdash where offerings were brought to H’Shem, we may still rely on H’Shem’s mercy. We may even bring our own offerings to Him, in a sense, by committing to the performance of good deeds, and doing tikkun hanefesh (the rectification of the soul). By devoting ourselves to H’Shem, we, ourselves, in certain sense may become an offering. So, in consideration of making ourselves an offering, may our prayers arise like sweet-smelling incense, and find favor with H’Shem.

Rosh Chodesh Adar 5783

Rosh Chodesh Adar 5783: 30 Shevat – 1 Adar

Reflection on the new month: Rosh Chodesh Adar 5783

This Adar will bring the globe, including, Jewish communities around the world full circle, three times over; inasmuch, that it will have been about three years since the proliferation of the coronavirus. May H’Shem have mercy on us; may He bless our lives, family, friends, and communities. May He preserve us during the days that will follow.

For the pandemic, nor the ramifications manifest in technological innovations, as well as geopolitical concerns are still in motion. How will we respond to the inherent issues that will accompany vaccine passports, Digital I.D., and eventually a social credit scoring system for individuals, as well as businesses, corporations and universities. (ESG is already in place for these latter institutions).

For myself, I have found much opportunity for reflection, writing, and kavanah (intention) throughout these past three years. I would also recomend to others, to occupy oneself with heshbon hanefesh (literally, an accounting of the soul): To examine one’s conscience in this manner, has the potential to lead to joy down the road, after rooting out unhealthy maladaptive behaviors, negative character traits, and making an effort to do better.

Personally, I count the hours of each and every day, until evening, when I hope to have fulfilled the day’s tasks, that are expected of me from Above. Yet, there is a disconnect between my quiet, reflective way of life, somewhat isolated, and removed from the changes occurring around the globe. Even so, to remain unaware of these changes will only provide a false assumption that these changes will not impact me personally.

May we all be productive in divinely inspired ways, and ask ourselves whether the future that the world is heading toward is one that we would view as ultimately of benefit to humankind. For, utopias have been promised by many movements of past history; in these cases, the promises were never realized. Why would anyone think differently in this case, where currently it may be that we are headed toward a dystopia. Regardless, trust in G-d, His will, and purpose, that His plan will be fulfilled, irrespective of any pursuit that is counter to His divine blueprint for humanity.

The Hebrew month of Adar is traditionally associated with joy (Taanis 29a).

May our joys in life increase, despite the challenges ahead. Amein.

Yom Kippur Katan: A Monthly Renewal of the Soul

Entering the New Month of Adar 5783

In lieu of the communal sin offering being brought up to the mizbeach in the Beis HaMikdash, a day of repentance, immediately preceding the New Month was established: this is called Yom Kippur Katan. And, the observance is on the 29th of the preceding month, in preparation of the renewal of the soul, that we hope to foster, through prayer, fasting, and repentance.

Pray for the Peace of Jerusalem

“Pray for the peace of Jerusalem; may they prosper that love thee. Peace be within thy walls, and prosperity within thy palaces. For my brethren and companions’ sakes, I will now say: ‘Peace be within thee. For the sake of the house of HaShem our G-d I will seek thy good.”

– Psalm 122:6-9, JPS 1917 Tanach

pray for the peace of Jerusalem: gathering at the Western Wall: click here.

terror in Jerusalem on the Sabbath: click here for news article

Exilic Prayer

motzei Shabbos: parasha Vayigash 5783

The divine yearning within us seeks to be consoled, by uniting ourselves with H’Shem. Therefore, rather than ignore the natural affinity that the soul has for the Creator, we should acknowledge this vital element in our personal makeup. That is to say, that without nurturing the soul’s need to connect to H’Shem, we deprive ourselves of the true source of our life. Yet, the question remains, how to properly access this source, the root of our essential selves

Judah makes an impassioned plea, for the sake of Benjamin, while addressing the Egyptian prince (Joseph) that stands before him: “Oh my lord, let thy servant, I pray thee, speak a word in my lord’s ears” (Genesis 44:18, JPS 1917 Tanach). Nesivos Shalom renders the passage in a symbolic manner, ascribing Judah’s words to a conversation with G-d. Rather than the plain meaning, wherein Judah is addressing the prince that stands before him as lord, he is addressing H’Shem. This passage is an allusion to the essence of prayer during the current exile; we seeking to consolation from the Shechinah – the presence of G-d Who dwells with us, for he is with us in the midst of our nisyanos as is written, “I will be with him in trouble” (Psalm 91:15).

.During this current exile, we may seek consolation through prayer; and, G-d’s presence will be with us, even in the midst of our suffering. Let us speak in G-d’s ears, all that troubles us, even offering our very selves as servants, as Judah offered to be a servant in place of his brother, Benjamin. Let us serve as surety for our brethren, K’lal Yisrael (All of Israel), and lead the way, towards redemption from Galus (Exile). Just as Joseph was reconciled to his brothers, may all of Israel be reconciled to H’Shem, through the unity that will be brought about only through Moshiach.

Prayer Request:

Yehudsi bas Tzviya (Judith, daughter of Sylvia)

Please, if you feel inspired to do so, pray for my mother, Yehudis bas Tzviya (Judith, daughter of Sylvia). She is 82 years old, and has a heart condition. She is being evaluated at a medical center, and may need to be hospitalized. She had been diagnosed with stage 2 heart failure; at current, further testing is being done.

May G-d bless you for your kindness.

Prayer & Sincerity

A Few Thoughts on Prayer and Sincerity: Elokai Neshama

“My G-d, the soul you placed within me is pure.”

– from the morning prayers

Too often, I am unable to say the beginning of this prayer “as is.” Was the original soul that G-d placed within me pure when I was born? Yes, as far as I know, I can receive this as a truth.

Is my soul renewed every morning, having spent some time in the upper realms to get a recharge, before being placed back within me before I wake up? No doubt, that my soul is renewed each and every morning, as implied elsewhere, “new every morning” (Lamentations 3:23).

Yet, I know myself too well; my conscience is not necessarily renewed to its pristine quality every morning. And, if yesterday’s taint upon the soul is still present in my mind, my soul does not “feel” pure when I awake to the “rise and shine” of the day.

For some time, I have been disconcerted by the apparent incongruity of how I feel, as compared to the literal text; so, I explored various ways to understand this concept of the soul’s purity being restored. One finding is that, only a certain part of the soul is referred to in the prayer; that part is “pure.”

I also seem to recall learning of tzaddikim, who were unable to say certain prayers in sincerity. As far as I can recall, they modified those particular prayers a little bit, for themselves, in the moment, in order to be heartfelt and true to their words. Yet, this is not to be understood as a pretext to actually changing the prayers of chazal (the sages).

Yet, there does appear to be a pretext to solving my own troublesome dilemma, by altering a prayer somewhat, at least, in the moment, to be faithful and true to one’s own words. As such, I usually say, “My G-d, may the soul you placed within me be pure.” I have turned a statement into a request.

Additionally, the prayers may be personalized, to some extent, while reciting them: that is the nature of personal kavannos, best explained as thoughts about the prayers while reciting them. (There are also specially designed kavannos to recall while reciting certain prayers).

on a personal note:

I am at my desk, nearly twenty-four hours a day, for I often fall to sleep at my desk. Yet, the time has arrived for me to question my motives, and activities. What do I do? Mostly I think, read, and write about G-d, religion, and scripture. However, this will not suffice. For, I have very little lived experience in actually serving G-d within the framework of an active compatible community. To what avail have I been attending services on Shabbos on a regular basis? Virtually none, for the pace of service is too fast for me to meaningful follow along. The interruptions and chatter are always present to some degree; and, additionally, there is no fertile opportunity for me to foster any sense of kavannah before during or after the service. Moreover, seudah (lunch) after services, is disappointing as well, even though at times, I do get to here an interesting dvar. Even so, mostly, the table(s) are full of mundane chatter about worldly topics, forbidden to speak about on Shabbos.

And, so, at my desk shall I remain until I am able to find another community for myself, according to H’Shem’s directive. Baruch H’Shem (Praise G-d), for taking me this far on the journey. As usual, I will need to move on at some point, perhaps, in the near future; that is to say, that it is typical in my life to change, and need to find somewhere else where there is “room to grow.” For now, I will take a break from attendance at the local shul where I have been davening in-person on Shabbos and holidays. After all, I still have the shul I attend on Zoom during the weekdays, as well as on Shabbos, early in the morning, inasmuch as I give myself a dispensation to do so, being that it is forbidden to use the internet on the Sabbath. It figures that all of these thoughts are preceded by my first ever purchase of a bottle of unkosher wine on Friday afternoon (under extenuating circumstances); perhaps, the treif wine has made my brain “loopy,” so to speak; although I feel as if I am “liberated” from the minutia of details, that plague the mind of an observant Jew. So be it, for now. I will remain on the derech (path); yet, I will tread mindfully as I walk along to eternity.

note: this blogpost was posted exactly at the end of Shabbat, erev 30 Nissan 5782.

Pesach 5782 – 7th Day

“And Moses said unto the people: Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the L-RD, which He will work for you to-day; for whereas ye have seen the Egyptians to-day, ye shall see them again no more for ever.” – Exodus 14:13, JPS 1917 Tanach

As the Egyptian army approached, Torah records that B’nei Yisrael, encamped near the Sea of Reeds, cried out to H’Shem in great fear (14:10). Commentary notes that the people were divided in their response: 1). Some cried out to H’Shem in prayer, akin to the later writing of the psalmist, “Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; but we will make mention of the name of the L-RD our G-d” (Psalm 20:8, JPS). 2). Another group of the people, having great trepidation about their circumstances, took the exact opposite approach, expressing their regret for having left Egypt, and complaining to Moshe (see Exodus 14:10-12).

When Moshe responded to the consternation of B’nei Yisrael, in light of their present circumstances, despite the seemingly near danger that was imminent, he said to them, “Fear ye not, stand still and see” (see above). Or HaChayim comments, that the words “stand still” convey the essence of prayer, a reliance on H’Shem, turning to Him in the midst of nisyanos (trials). He notes that the same Hebrew phrase is used in the Tanach, in regard to the prayer of Hannah, Samuel’s mother, who prayed in all sincerity to H’Shem. The picture derived from this understanding is one of a people’s reliance on H’Shem, in hope of seeing His salvation at a time of great need, when Pharaoh’s army was bearing down on them.

That night, an angel of H’Shem protected the people from the Egyptians, a cloud darkened the Egyptian camp, while a pillar of light shined upon the B’nei Yisrael. Moshe stretched his hand over the sea; and, H’Shem caused the sea to part by way of a strong east wind. The Children of Israel passed through the sea; however, when the Egyptians pursued them, Pharaoh and his army were drowned in the sea. Our own expectations of H’Shem for deliverance in our lives, regardless of our circumstances, when made through the prayer of sincerity, may bring results greater than our expectations. Especially, when there is no other recourse to be made, it is then that we may see the grandeur of His salvation. This is the type pf prayer that will be required, directly preceding the Final Redemption.